Report Dedications
by CraftyNotepad
Summary: With Valentine's Day over and Spring just around the corner, young nearly adult minds turn to their fast approaching due dates of their class term papers.


Disclaimer: I don't own Phil of the Future. I just love the series!

**Report Dedications**

With Valentine's Day over and Spring just around the corner, young nearly adult minds turn to their fast approaching due dates of their class term papers. Amazing, isn't it, what some students will write to cover all of one of Mr. Hackett's infamous five thousand word essays? Speaking of writing, how about getting your feet wet in the typing pool? A friendly place to test the water is **SlickNickShady'**s new "**Texts From Last Night: Pickford Edition**" in which he's inviting PotF fans to write their own short text message. Check it out, then post some of your own! - Perpetually Pickford, CraftyNotepad.

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_**Civics **_

_I dedicate this to Vice-Principal Hackett, without whose superior guidance, inspiration and dedication to tomorrow's citizens life would not be worth living. When I grown up I want to be just like him! He's truly one in a million and should be made principal before the semester ends. (See students? That's how a dedication should be written! Oh, and remember to sign it.)_

_- Neil Hackett_

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**Biology**

I dedicate this term paper on the migratory patterns of paper clips in Pickford to Mr. Angst, who let me write this in substitution for dissecting a pig. Thank you for your assistance with the linear regression calculations, too. You rock!

- Seth Wosmer

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**Political Science**

Political Science can be explored in the macro or the micro. Take my family for example, PLEASE! Buy one parent, get the other one free! (Did I say that out loud?) Anyway, political dynamics can be studied and understood at the micro level in a "typical American family," such as my own. Let's examine my family, extended and otherwise. Um, obviously I've taken some poetic license in my description of my family. (They're just so boring on their own.) I mean, we'r'e really not from the future. Time travel is about as possible as Berwick stealing from the collection plate, my stupid brother and his "friend" no longer being clueless about one another, and our vice-principal growing a head of wavy, curly hair. I dedicate this term paper to Napoleon Bonaparte. He stands in history as evidence that size does not matter, only desire and drive. It doesn't matter how tall one is as long as feet reach the ground. My boots were made for walking and grinding my enemies into dust. Grade this paper poorly at your own risk.

- Pim Diffy.

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**Natural History**

I dedicate this assignment to Phil Diffy's Uncle Curtis. He's taught me more about primitive hunting and survival techniques on one Saturday than I've learned from school books all semester. Without the insights revealed to me by him this would have just been another school assignment to be handed in and forgotten. This time I think I really managed to get an education. Yes, Curtis is so far out that he's already in; can you dig it? Well, on to the next chapter of my report on the hunting of prey, or as my Natural History mentor calls them: not fast runners. I couldn't come up with a better way to - well, maybe I could, but I don't wanna. I learned a lot from Curtis Saturday. I learned how to read tracks and tell if the animal was hungry, hurt, or had just eaten. How to find water, how to find shelter, and rocks - Man, oh, man - does Curtis ever know rocks! Anyway, back to this report, I guess. I suppose the best way to tell you what I learned is to first tell you what Curtis told me about his self. Man, the dude is out there! If only 10-percent of what he told me is true, he's seriously twisted for the remaining nine-tenths! Read on and check it out for yourself.

-Owen Norad

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_** Sociology**_

_There are few social structures that stand the test of time, and technology is every changing in the world that we live in. Even still, family persists. More than just a source of food, clothing, and shelter, family provides a link to history - family history. We've all heard the sayings, such as "those who don't learn from their own personal history are doomed to repeat it," and "until you know where you're coming from how can you get where you're going?" I know where I came from._

_I dedicate this term paper on sociology to my mentor, my mother. My entire life she's taught me about family traditions, history, and, yes, even our black sheep. I know about generations of my family, such characters, scoundrels and acorns abound. My mother says that every great oak exists because some little nut held it's ground. I don't think my mother is a nut, yet she's as sturdy as an oak, has sacrificed and worked so hard to take care of me. She's my favorite acorn in my family. Knowing more about me and my mother, you should recognize where I get my spunk from. I have my dreams and I'm going to achieve both of them._

_- Keely Teslow_

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**Computer Science**

_Don't you just love term papers? I do! Maybe it's the crisp white pages brimming with I dedicate this term paper on, or the opportunity to enrich their surfaces with fresh ink. The chance to enhance the egos of teachers by working hard so they'll pat themselves on the back for the hard work I do ... I digress. Guess I'm overheating once more._

_- Deborah H. Berwick :-D_

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**Hamlet**

I dedicate this term paper about Shakespeare to his author, Hamlet. Hamlet wrote many plays, some of which have been rescued from oblivion by making them into feature films. Although I give credit in this dedication to Hamlet, some scholars think that Ham's really name was Bacon. - Tia Chen

:-) )-:

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**Local Government**

_I dedicate this term paper on the importance of citizens to influence local government. I wouldn't refer to any of the following citizens as "ordinary" - perhaps somewhere, but definitely not in Pickford. Each citizen shapes the community in subtle ways and our town of Pickford wouldn't be recognizable without every one of them. If you don't believe me then just glance over the profiles presented below. - Alice Da Luca_

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_**Interior Design**_

_I dedicate this term paper on interior design to the myriad of television series intent on selling people on the idea that they are inferior if they don't spend tens of thousands of dollars redressing their homes. This money would be better spent on education, poverty, homelessness, even installing a solar water heater on their roof – anything rather than changing the kitchen's cabinet faces from oak to stainless steel. It's been drilled into our heads this term that "form follows function," yet what I see being done in the media is neither necessary, innovative nor functional. "Form Follows Function" actually stands for the triple "F"s that the interior design industry deserves._

_Nevertheless, this is an class on interior design. I present here two separate sets of impressions upon elements of a home of today ... and one of the future!_

_- Grady Spaggett_

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_**Ethics**_

I dedicate this term paper on the superior ethics of the teenage male to Mr. Ginsberg, who, in addition to being an awesome advisor and drama producer of the upcoming production of Aaron Stone, the Musical. Aaron is a tall, dashing teenager embodying superior ethics, like myself. - Tanner Kirkpatrick, Actor

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**Chemistry**

I dedicate this term paper on the wonders of chemistry to a tenth grader who requests anonymity, but who taught me the advantages of chemical triggers. Chemistry is awesome in allowing "things" to occur at a predetermined time in the future, while I'll could be doing something else, some where else, with witnesses. Witnesses are vital, just like chemical bonding, and joy buzzers. - Kyle Speckle

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**Physics: Chaos Theory**

I dedicate this term paper on order and chaos to

Candida Keagle, who stylishly exemplifies order in the chaos which is eighth grade. Thank you for your invaluable make-up consultations during first, third and sixth periods. There really is no better way to deal with the chaos of smudge whipgloss better than a fresh application of WinkyPink! - Fiona Lamky

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**_Detention_**

_I dedicate this disciplinary report on all the &%$#! and !#$%&* dweebs at Wells. Students, too! This crummy school has no sense of humor, no appreciation for style, true genius, or a person with vision. One day, I will be in charge and then they'll be payback like money loaners only dream of! So say I, Pim Diffy, Future-Ruler-At-Large._

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What do you mean by "better clean up your language, Pim"? What'd I say that was worse than what's below?

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**Technology**

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I dedicate this term paper on the cutting edge of the applied science frontier to Junior Science Squad Captain Pim Diffy who's captivated me with her resounding encyclopedic knowledge of science. There's no carbon-based lifeform more deserving of the position of Squad Captain than the one who can wield annelid mastery to dissect a wild pack of marauding fashion zombies. Truly, the worm is mightier than the zombie which it ingests!

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- Snooger


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